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I mainly have my meltdowns in grocery stores. For about a decade I would do my grocery shopping on Thursday nights, knowing my boyfriend would be coming into town on Friday. I have some small cooking skill, provided the proper tools and environment, and I would often make the effort and attempt new recipes for our Friday night meals. Some of my culinary creations were fabulous successes…some dismal failures. Now when I grocery shop there ain’t no magic a happenin’…and I’m more likely to buy the $.99 bologna than a couple of ribeyes. Today was a pretty sucky day, I had seen my true-love-who-doesn’t-want-me-and-is-in-fact-married-to-someone-else and he looked soo cute as he looked straight ahead and steadfastly ignored me as I walked by holding my stomach in because I was worried I looked fat…and Valentine’s Day is coming and I am all alone, just like New Year’s and Christmas and Thanksgiving and my birthday…so I’m wandering the aisles of le Winn-Dixie on Marina all whiny and weepy when 99 Love Balloons starts to play. I perk up, I calm down, I chill. I start to nod my head and softly sing along. I get cruised by a gay couple who are obviously intoxicated and enthralled by my raw sexual magnetism…I look them up and down, smile and shake my head slightly just once, no thank you, good day, keep it movin’, but yes you are correct I still have it, whatever “it” is. Nena has momentarily lifted my spirits, I have the energy to keep on keepin’ on for a little while longer.

Hab’ ‘nen Luftballon gefunden
Denk’ an dich und lass’ ihn fliegen

I have found a balloon…I think of you, and let it fly

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