The White Party was last weekend, Art Basel is this whole week, and the Book of Mormon is about to start a weeklong run…sadly, budgetary constraints and the Man keeping me down will not allow me to enjoy these fun things that homosexuals like. I can still go flea market shopping though, look at all my Treasure! From the Swap Shop in Fort Lauderdale, ya heard?
A pound puppy monkey, a old chimpanzee Curious George? monkey, and Po the Teletubbie (George stunk and burst when I put him in the wash) $1 each, $3
Tupac and Gina Cascone memoirs, 50 cents each, $1 #tupacisalive
Total toothpastes, $1 each, $3
A black cat that Cricket has already halfway murdered $1
2 pink harnesses, one is Martha Stewart, $1 each, $2
A pair of 5 pound barbells, so i’ll be all swole and have muscles, $1
2 George Foreman grills, $1 each, $2 and both work fine!
A Cupcake Brown memoir and A Beginner’s Guide to Martial Arts, 50 cents each, $1
a baking pan $1
3 boxes of Nag Champa $5 I haven’t burned Nag Champa for quite a while, and my luck has been crappy…maybe burning it again will change my karma or something
*not pictured: 2 Mountain Dews, a sesame cake, a grape snow cone, a corn dog and 2 arepas
I always catch deals, know when things are half price, get the hookup. It’s almost like stealing, having my skill set at the Swap Shop, the biggest flea market in the world, in Broward County.
3 12-foot retractable leashes for the dogs, a Tinker Bell collar and a bulldog coffeee mug, all from Petsmart, $1 each, $5 total. The leashes still had the clearance price of $15.27 each on them.
Vitamins, Fish Oil, Fiber, Acai Berry, Men’s and Energy dietary supplements, 2 for $1, $5 total, vitamins and fiber for months!
*the sketchy guy who sold me the Petsmart stuff told me he dug it out of their dumpster, and all of the vitamins were expired, but I’m cool with that
@thejohnjernigan, animals, Anne Rice, boston terrier, buy John's book, Confederacy of Dunces, country, culture, dogs, flea market, french bulldog, funny, gay, hobbies, humor, Jim Butcher, Laurell K. Hamilton, LGBT, pets, Pinellas Park, rednecks, second hand, shopping, St. Petersburg, sweet home Alabama, tampa, Tampa Bay, Thrift Store
Nothing reminds me more of my Alabama roots than a good ole flea market.
My purchases this day:
A Boston Terrier painting for my kitchen, and a print of 2 bugs? that looks all modern and whatnot: $5 and $3
A camouflage dog bed: $4 This was a suspiciously low price, as the bed is almost new. I quickly discovered why, as it became evident that the last dog had peed all up on the bed. Now my car smells like pee, and I am going to have to wash it several times to get all traces of urine smell out, as Cricket will mark (pee) on it to show her dominance if she smells urine. She’s such a boss, when Squeak pees Cricket goes and pees on top of Squeak’s pee, to remind her what time it is in the hood.
Books check ’em out: A nice, new Confederacy of Dunces, Laurell K. Hamilton, Jim Butcher and Anne Rice: $8.75
not shown: cinnamon sugar donuts and caramel kettle corn and nachos…and a large DIET coke